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I am a mother who works full-time but who is also a chauffer, chef, seamstress, fitness instructor, teacher, maid, gardener, runner, organization expert, salesperson, secretary and wife. I love my family and life is always busy but fun! Come along with me for the ride:-)

Monday, June 15, 2009

Females or Felines ??

Some of you have daughters and will totally understand where I'm coming from. Some of you have babies / young toddlers and have a lot to look forward to in the future. Everyone says that my two daughters look exactly alike except for their hair. I know they favor but I just don't see the "exactly alike" part. However, if you are around them for long you will realize what very different personalities they have. It shows that God truly makes us each as one-of-a-kind, uniquely loved by Him.

My oldest is social, outgoing, very vocal, never meets a stranger, is very energetic, vivacious, emotional, opinionated (wonder where she gets that from;\), etc. She is close friends with four other girls and has been for about four years. They are all strong personalities so you can imagine that the after school director of the daycare literally wants to pull her hair out (or either she secretly covers the gray). Cassie will never let anyone run over her which I figure is a good trait but she wears her emotions on her sleeve and they hang on by one thread at all times. She tells me everything - and I literally mean EVERYTHING! She just tells me at inopportune times - like at 9:00 p.m. when she should be asleep.

My youngest is loud (not from being outgoing - she literally has a loud voice), energetic in her own way, emotional in her own way, opinionated in her own way, but she is more laid back, very logical, and very introverted in her thought process. Bailee tells me nothing, absolutely nothing - not that her teeth are loose, not that she had to punch someone's lights out because they attacked her first, not that her feelings were hurt by a friend, not who her friends are, not what they fought about, not what she's thinking, etc. You get where I'm going with this ?

Which is better - to tell everything....or to keep it all inside? In one way, my youngest is more mature than the oldest - she gets it, she knows when to not worry about it, she gets mad...gets even....says her piece....and it's over. My oldest keeps it on her shoulders....bears the burden, feels the emotions to the fullest, cries (whines too), for days....days......days.....etc.

Me - I have the personality of my youngest. I have never been overly emotional. I just think it through - find a logical explanation or solution - and I just either take care of it or I just get over it. I can ask myself "Will this matter two weeks from now?" and I'm okay with the answer I give myself. Needless to say I do not understand or get my oldest daughter's personality. I almost think that one of two things will happens as she gets closer to puberty. She will be on mood-altering drugs or her MAMA will !!

I pray every day for patience, guidance, wisdom and the ability to think like a female. I am VERY MUCH a female except in the all encompassing emotional areas. Turning forty did not move me any closer to that PMS, bitchy, emotional right side of my brain either. I am so left-sided that I don't think anything will ever move me towards that either - not even menopause when it finally gets here.

Females are sort of like cats (felines). They are very protective of their friends, family, children, self, etc. Cross them and you'll bear the burden of their wrath. However, the least little thing can make them explode and attack and you won't have a clue why sometimes. Put your hand out in friendship or goodwill and you'll come back with a nub :-) You never know what we're thinking either (some of us even have a poker face, although that is very rare).

How easily we snub each other, gossip about each other, compare ourselves to each other? How can we expect our little girls to stop the bickering and learn to get along and love, respect & support each other if we certainly do not give them an example to learn from? Next time your friend, co-worker, family member or acquaintenance pushes your buttons - remember that someone is watching you - and they are learning from your words (even those you mumble), your facial expressions, your reactions and your deeds.

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